Intentions and Expectations

I am reading an article from Psychology Today entitled "The Perils of Intentions and Expectations." This sums up every day off for me, every diet, every career goal, every everything.

Part of it is that the author references the fact that she wrote a novel then uses that throughout to illustrate terms. It's weird to feel guilty before you even read something, so I'm going to play the Blame Game. I blame the fact that I drank coffee and that I did it so late in the day. It's totally not helping me accomplish my goals, mainly because it's a hot beverage and not a personal trainer. Of course, if I HAD a personal trainer here yelling at me, first, I'd wonder and probably say aloud, "Whyyyyy are you in my house?" Then, I'd say, "GET OUT AND STOP YELLING AT ME!"

To quote Tardy the Turtle, "You are doing lots of things!" which is what I told myself when I realized around 1pm that I don't want to leave the house without pajamas, I don't want to go out IN my pajamas, and I don't really want to go anywhere at all. I made a ton of phone calls to acquire information and make plans that I should've done last week, last month, and a few years ago. Yet, that still leaves me with the guilt that I haven't done any of the errands and chores I needed to do today. Now, this wouldn't bother me, except it means that I have to do EVERYTHING I didn't do tomorrow. If I were single, I'd be like, "Sweet, another day to relax. Inside. On the couch. In my comfort zone."

Being married means several things, but one thing it especially means is that if you don't complete tasks, you let down the person you love (hopefully, or at least top 2?) most in the world. When I got married, it's like someone plunked down next to me and handed me a package.

"What's this?" I asked, turning over the cleverly disguised, brown paper wrapped package. It looked like a giant, cool ball was inside.
"Oh that!" the Emotional Postal Delivery Service replied, lightly. "This is your guilt."
"I...I don't want this. I won't sign for it," I said, holding it back up.
EPDS shook its head. "You can't refuse it. It's your inheritance. It's not all about you anymore. Now you have someone else you have to consider in all this. Soooo congratulations, and have fun with this!"

It occurs to me instead of writing about all this, I could just go out and get things done. Uhhhh goodbye!

Update: My husband thought I was doing laundry tomorrow. Score! He didn't care that I didn't do it today. Although, now there are a bunch of things I have to tackle tomorrow instead of today, plus we ran errands when he came home. Silver lining (and it's raining so that saying is more amusing), I don't have to do laundry.